same routine, same thing but different feel..

sending u to sch, lying on my shoulder, holding to my hand, kiss sending you back home.
its a thing im doing since im with you. today we did the same thing too.. im happy ever since we broke up.. we r doing this like before.. times is like going back to the past time.. when we still tog like a little happy couple..
but
today, its different.. the more happy i feel inside me, more sadness is within me. there are things missing. im feeling so down u know... i want to kiss u whenever i wan.. i wan to hold ur hand when ever i wan... but just, i cant.. loneliness inside me is getting huge that i cant hide it anymore. i really deep in love with u, when u smile, i smile deep in my heart too... i just wanna keep u with me.. like nvr before.. when i walked behind u. i gt the urge to hug u and say don leave me.. when i look into ur eyes. i gt the urge to kiss u and keep u with me. when i see your hand.. i gt the urge to hold you tight and nvr let go.. theres so many urge i want to do. i just don have the courage. how sad i can be.. the distance seem so near but yet is far till i cant reach. 4days le.. 96hs of life without u is meaningless, full of pain, sadness and loneliness. just now when you when home, when the lift door closing, my heart cried.... i just wan to hug u like how i do in the past..
god, i don hope for much you know.. i don care in the past, how much hurt i had. how much sadness i been through. finally, i found the 1 im looking for, but why the fate is pulling us away from each other.. if can, just take away anything from me, in exchange her back to my side forever.. im willing to change it.. anything.. pls, im begging u god. let her back to me.. let her be my baby again.. let her be the 1 i dote i hold i kiss again.

today was kinda disappointed i think, after so hard to ask out. i was looking forward that i can spend time with her alone. to have dinner, to look at her and stuff.. and just a short 2hours. hai..
?
baby can you feel how much i want u? why u still hesitating? why u still don wan come back to me? u bear to see how down and terrible im now? come back to me.. just 1 word yes will do =(
i love u more then anything else in this world.. hai

Labels: disappointment.., sadness